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Description
Lapham's Rules of InfluenceAs the editor of Harper's Magazine, Lewis Lapham has enjoyed entr e to America's "cultural elite," a class distinguished by its talent for currying favor, licking boots, and kissing ass. Now, in this scathingly funny and politically incorrect self help book, Mr. Lapham offers his best advice to aspiring careerists seeking to ride in helicopters and see themselves on television. Drawing upon a lifetime of experience among the cogno scenti, Mr. Lapham
As the editor of Harper's Magazine, Lewis Lapham has enjoyed entr e to America's "cultural elite," a class distinguished by its talent for currying favor, licking boots, and kissing ass. Now, in this scathingly funny and politically incorrect self-help book, Mr. Lapham offers his best advice to aspiring careerists seeking to ride in helicopters and see themselves on television. Drawing upon a lifetime of experience among the cogno-scenti, Mr. Lapham breaks rank and reveals the unspoken secrets of getting ahead: what to say, how to dress, when to lie, whom to befriend, where to be seen, and why it is absolutely essential to wear clean shoes. ("The first impression is also the last impression. You don't wish to be remembered as the stain on the rug.") Anyone interested in self-advancement will be transformed by Lapham's Rules of Influence, which offers proven nuggets of wisdom. For example, when trying to impress the boss, remember: "Flattery cannot be too often or too recklessly applied. Think of it as suntan lotion or moisturizing cream." Written with stinging wit and tongue planted firmly in cheek, Lapham's Rules of Influence is a brilliant critique of class and manners in America, packed with the kind of irreverent observation that only Lewis Lapham can provide. Seek out the acquaintance of people richer and more important than yourself, and never take an interest in people who cannot do you any favors. Rumor tinged with malice is the most precious form of gossip. When you are invited to spend a weekend with important journalists or movie stars, it is considered polite to bring four items of unpublished slander in lieu of a house present or a bottle of wine. Make unsparing use of clich s. The empty word is the correct word. Contrary to the opinion of snobbish New York intellectuals, the placid murmur of clich is always preferable to the expression of strong feeling, which is an embarrassment. A truly fashionable dinner party ends at the moment when all the guests have arrived and everybody has been seen or not seen. Once attendance has been taken, the rest of the evening is superfluous. A good meeting is one at which nothing happens. Sit erect, second all the motions, remember everybody's name. From the Hardcover edition.Binding Type: Paperback
Publisher: Random House
Published: 05/18/1999
ISBN: 9780812992342
Pages: 176
Weight: 0.52lbs
Size: 8.70h x 4.96w x 0.45d
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4.4 ★★★★★
Based on 18 reviews
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Product Reviews
★★★★★ 5
Dog loves it
Great durability and unpredictability. Dog loves it and we love it. It’ll last a long time.
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Reviewed in the United States on October 29, 2023
★★★★★ 4
It's A Beast - But It'll Last Forever
Color: Large size (ø 7.4")
This big orange interactive dog toy does a few things differently—and mostly, it does them right.
First, there are no batteries and no charging required. The internal noise maker is activated by movement, producing little squeaks and quacks that grab a dog’s attention without turning into an electronic science experiment. Second—and more importantly—this thing is built to last. It’s designed to work as both a ball and a tug toy, which means it’s far tougher than the typical interactive balls that get shredded in short order. I fully expect this one to stick around for a long time.
That said, the reaction from my dogs was… mixed. All of them were a bit spooked at first. The sounds made them curious but cautious. My Border Collie was the first to commit and play with it, and she gave it a solid try. After a while, though, interest faded and the toy ended up sitting on the floor largely ignored.
I can get them engaged if I roll it around and hype things up, but the two dogs that usually love tug-of-war haven’t latched onto this one yet. My guess is this toy will shine more outdoors. Once spring rolls around and it’s flying across the yard instead of the living room floor, I suspect it’ll get a lot more action. My dogs tend to burn energy—and enthusiasm—much faster outside.
If you have a heavy chewer that destroys fragile interactive toys (and drains your wallet in the process), this is a very welcome alternative. Considering how quickly $35–$50 electronic balls can meet their end, this toy earns its place in the basket for durability alone.
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Reviewed in the United States on December 16, 2025
★★★★★ 3
Good for non chewers
Color: Large size (ø 7.4")
Dog lived it for the 4 minutes before he chewed a large hole in it. Definitely not for heavy chewers.
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Reviewed in the United States on April 28, 2026
★★★★★ 1
Terrible
Color: Medium size (ø 5.5")
Received 39 minutes ago. Chewed up in tiny pieces already. Feels like hard plastic in a cheap car.
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Reviewed in the United States on December 12, 2025
★★★★★ 5
This is actually a fantastic dog toy!
Color: Large size (ø 7.4")
I originally got this for my golden retriever. He loves all things ball-shaped and I figured the handles would make this really easy for him to carry and for me to tug. It was a fantastic hit not only with the retriever but my lab and even my older Great Dane also love this toy. It's about the size of a soccer ball and covered in a nice rubber that can be chewed off if you have a destructive player but is more than durable enough for tossing around the house or even in the yard. Chewability-wise, The Dane managed to chew a couple of chunks off the handle part but he's probably a pretty extreme example. I think this would hold up just fine for most dogs' play. I just have to supervise it with my Dane so that he doesn't chew it into a pile of rubber.
The biggest surprise of this ball was the fact that it has one of those slide whistles in it that makes a noise as it tumbles and rolls around. This proved irresistible to the Golden Retriever and the Lab. Every time they hear the slide whistle inside, they get up from wherever they are and focus 100% on this ball.
It has some heft to it and it bounces a little but not as much as a regular ball its size, it's fun for the little ones to play with inside but it's primarily an outdoor dog toy. The handles are big enough for a human hand to hold them comfortably. It rolls in a hard-to-predict way that is extra helpful for the smaller dogs to chase.
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Reviewed in the United States on December 22, 2025